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Every Day a Little Death
Jerrod CorboDate: Tuesday, 01 Dec 2009, 7:11 PM | Message # 1
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Things were going great. This three day tour on Coruscant had been a brilliant idea and he was glad all the guys had agreed to it. WarpDrive was still a relatively unknown band in the Galaxy, but their fan base within the Core was growing what with the sold out shows they had given. Ok, true, the venue wasn’t all that big, but hey, this was great publicity! And he was as happy as he could be with the guys he had assembled a little over two years ago. He couldn’t help but to look at them as he finished this tune, smiling as he did so: Vril Rokk the Zabrak on the quetarra, Gran Reez the Nautolan on the power drum, Myles Davenby and Edrian Stavros the humans on touchboard/backup vocals and bass vye respectively. And of course, there was himself, Jerrod Corbo, the frontman, the one in charge of this ragtag team.

His vibrato died as the ballad ended, cheers erupting throughout the site they had booked. This disused hanger cum storage facility now emptied of its former goods was perfect for them. “Thank you!” he said, his voice echoing throughout, a gaggle of girls in the front rows jumping excitedly as he winked at them. He just knew how to play the crowd. The band catered to both males and females, usually in their mid-teens to late twenties, but he knew a few older men and women who enjoyed the group’s softer songs like the one he had just performed.

That’s when it hit him, just as he was readying himself for their next number, a raucous tune that was heavier and gruffer. He felt the ping at the back of his mind, that small jolt of pressure, and his vision blurred. Translucent colours and lights flashed all around him and they had nothing to do with stage effects, for only he could see them. He shouldn’t be seeing such things, that much he knew. Since 15 he had to contend with this mental condition he was hiding from everyone. After all, who would have wanted to hang out with a schizo who heard voices in his head and saw odd things? And with his father a pharmaceutical magnate and his mom a prominent surgeon on Rhinnal, he knew they’d probably have him institutionalized. Oh the joys of living with hypochondriacs and medical know-it-all. And just as on cue, the voices flooded his mind: a cacophony of men, women, old, young, Basic, alien, soft, harsh… He was already sweating thanks to the projectors and his usual nerves, but the onset of cascading voices in his mind made him perspire even more. He turned to look at the guys and winced, giving them the thumbs up to go ahead. They all knew not to question him when he usually felt weaker and he had argued with Vril a million times about his condition being nothing serious. He just lied and attributed it to bouts of nerves that would never leave him no matter how long he’d perform. They each slowly nodded, acknowledging the go ahead as inconspicuously as they could, and the music started. The way he was feeling was the raison d’être for this song, an homage to his messed up head, the things he saw, the things he heard and the pain he silently suffered. It also dealt with his enumerable mood swings. He counted in his head and jumped into the song as he had practiced many times before.

He sang his heart out, his voice rough, raw and passionate. The song was as hot as mid-summer on Tatooine and as fierce as a blood fight. The song was full of love and hope, but despair and pain. It told the story of the best... but worst... of civilization. In the crowd, heads started swaying and the people moved to the beat. But as he continued singing, things changed. Everyone became on edge, seemingly ready to explode. Unknown to him, something was intensifying the crowd’s negative emotional state to match the tone of the song.

That’s when all hell broke loose.

The dancing was replaced by heckling, people shoving one another and throwing punches. Screams and shouts drowned the music and singing which soon abruptly stopped. “Ladies and gentlemen, please, remain calm! We urge you to stop...” boomed Jerrod’s voice to little effect. He turned around to look at his bemused band members with the hope that they could help and support him, but a loud thud and a sudden throbbing pain on the side of his head brought him to his knees, his already blurry vision swimming. Although the voices in his head subsided, his thoughts were adrift in a sea of incoherence and he couldn’t even make sense of Edrian and Myles calling out his name. Within seconds, he was out cold.

-----------------------------------

Well, this was new. The throbbing on the side of his head was not the usual twinges he had at the back. And the blackness was... a nice change. But as the minutes passed, this complacency was replaced with the need of actually opening his eyes. He didn’t know how long it had truly been, but he had for some time heard shuffling of feet and hushed voices. His eyes were flooded with bright light as he opened them, blinking repeatedly as he tried to adjust his vision. He was lying on the sofa in the room at the back of the hangar which they used as a dressing room, the guys leaning against the walls, arms crossed and in conversation; no doubt about him. Jerrod slowly pushed himself into a sitting position, breaking the tension. “How long have I been out for?” he asked to no one in particular.

“Oh good, you’re up” exclaimed Gran as all four walked towards him. “And barely 10 minutes now. You were hit by a chair by the way. Well, part of it.” he added, cutting Jerrod who had opened his mouth to ask what the hell had happened. He reached to his head and felt a bit of dried blood on the side where a wound had only just recently stopped bleeding and he couldn’t help but notice stained towels in the sink. Oh joy... he’d have fun explaining that to his parents.

“Didn’t you call medics?”

“Nah” piped in Vril. “We know you hate medcenters, so we figure we’d try to fix you up with a medpac and hope for the best. We’d have brought you to one if you hadn’t woken up in 10 minutes. Geez...” he said as he noticed Jerrod’s unimpressed look.

From what the boys told him, they had dragged his unconscious form from the stage and had hightailed it back to this room for protection. Security forces had just recently arrived and were trying to maintain peace and calm everyone down. From the looks of it, there were injuries, but no major ones. As to why the crowd reacted this way, no one knew. The song had been well received yesterday and the day before, so the reason for the erratic reaction was anybody’s guess. While they discussed some more, Jerrod excused himself and grabbed a small bag as he walked to the refresher, locking the door behind him. He looked at himself in the mirror and grimaced: his face was pale, his green eyes bloodshot and his red hair dishevelled and caked with dry blood on one side. He just looked horrible on the whole. And there had been that stupid onset of psycho-freak-out as he usually called it. Dammit. He had taken four Nyex before the show, they should have numbed his mind enough to keep the craziness at bay but keep him lucid enough to function properly…

The advantage of having a father owning a large pharmaceutical company was that Jerrod frequently helped himself to productions. True, an employee with a dodgy record probably got a good talking too or was fired after a while when it became apparent that medication was being taken out of the facilities, but Jerrod didn’t mind terribly if it helped him cope with his situation. And helped it had, ever since he was 15. His preference lied with Nyex or Hypnocane (to which he was mostly immune by now, having to constantly up the dosage) and had twice taken Renatyl. Only once in memory had he injected himself with Thanatizine. The latter was highly potent and only to be used for the worst cases given the consequences of taking more than what one’s body was capable of withstanding.

Jerrod rummaged in the small black bag and took out a small bottle, popping it open and shaking two extra Nyex into his other hand. Seconds later, they were swallowed and well down his oesophagus. He knew the effects weren’t as instantaneous as he wanted and figured there was nothing that could be done to salvage the concert. Might as well go back to the semi-seedy pad they were renting and call it at night. He reassured his band that all was fine and that all he needed was a good night’s sleep. Yes, he was sure he didn’t need their assistance and that they could enjoy the night off and go clubbing as they wanted. They wished him good night and patted him on the back as he made his way out through a service entrance, Gran following him as he’d be the one driving him back to their pad.

-----------------------------------

It hit him as he passed the threshold: the onslaught against his mind, the salvo of voices bombarding his psyche making him want to rip his head off. He closed his eyes and gritted his teeth, his stomach lurching so much his head hurt. He half opened his eyes to make his way throughout the room, dropping his carrying bag on the drab colored sofa of the communal living area before stumbling back into an open space. The colors and lights flashed and swam before his eyes, as beautiful but as painful as ever. What was wrong with him tonight? He had been medicating so much lately he had expected those recurring attacks to have been pushed back to the far side of his mind, locked and hindered by the drugs he desperately believed helped him. And things went from bad to worse… He hunched over as his heart felt like bursting, not so much from physical pain but from too many conflicting emotions. How was this even possible? He could feel love, hate, passion, indifference, the will to help, the strength of destruction… He was left panting, bent in half and crouching, one hand beating furiously against his head, the other clutching at the heart he felt breaking into a million pieces. And all around him, small objects were rising slowly into the air. Plain paintings, a datapad, a comlink, empty bottles, whatever decoration and other knick-knacks contained in the living area were circling around him as though he were the eye of a maelstrom. He was drenched in sweat, his cheaply sealed wound on his head reopening, and he truly was going crazy… He was insane. Even the heavier objects around him started to quiver and tremble. He had to stop this… stop the madness. He reached into his carrier bag and fumbled for a hypo-syringe and a vial of Thanatizine. The vial already contained the amount his body could handle for him to be reduced into a temporary vegetative state. He was trembling so much and in such pain that it was next to impossible for him to even draw the liquid from the fragile vial. Blood had started trickling down his nostrils and he felt himself slipping slowly into unconsciousness, but not from the medicine he was failing at using.

The voices in his head were drowning him and his own body seemed to be rebelling against him. Faster and faster the objects swirled around him, many colliding with walls and furniture, breaking up as they did. No longer able to keep silent, he parted his teeth and shouted in agony, his body seizing up and his head thrusting upwards. The swirling objects were hurled against the walls like projectile, smashing up as they did and leaving holes before lying motionless on the floor or still imbedded in the walls. The windows in the room burst outwards into a myriad of pieces and rained down the building. Chairs, tables and other furniture were pushed back against walls and blocking the door, leaving Jerrod in a perfectly clear centre in a heavily damaged room. His eyes closed and he collapsed onto the dirty and smell floor like a rag doll, hypo-syringe and vial of Thanatizine lying next to him.

And Jerrod was at peace.

He should have known better. He should have invested more time in research instead of indulging in self-medication. It was pointless to squash out the Force from his system or ignore it. Instead of embracing it, he had treated it as a disease, turning it against his own body rather than learning to cope with his abilities. What could have been harmless was turned into a highly volatile and pressurized combustible which always risked bursting forth. And today it finally had, after years of being pent up. The volcano had been blocked, and rather than staying dormant, it had burst forth not from the blocked crater but from a myriad of secondary openings which had formed themselves throughout the years.

Although far from being powerful in the Force, the boy’s outburst sent a spike which would nonetheless be felt by anyone attuned to it in the region.

Guess he could kick his growing career goodbye. And he was sure to be barred from renting this dump ever again.


Jerrod Corbo

Message edited by Jerrod Corbo - Wednesday, 02 Dec 2009, 12:29 PM
 
Raztlain_AliesDate: Thursday, 03 Dec 2009, 9:45 AM | Message # 2
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Raztlain Alies bolted upright in his bed; his heart beating wildly and his breath ragged and raspy as if he had run several miles. His muscles were fatigued and a wave of nausea threatened to double him over. His bedding was cold and damp with perspiration and his hair was matted to his forehead; his arm shook as he reached up to wipe his face.

It was the dream that woke him, or at least he thought it was. It was not a bad dream, really, but it was not a good one either. It seemed more like a memory, a review of the worst of his life repeated over and over until it culminated into a wave of emotion so powerful even the thought of it made him dizzy.

The memory of Alderaan plagued him frequently, but not like this. Many people knew that he hailed from there, but few knew of the pain he still bore, the anger in his father’s eyes moments before the planet erupted. Of course, that was a long time ago and none but Gelu Torva knew the entire story; none but her had stood by his side through it all.

Gelu…that was another recurring theme in his dreams of late and indeed had been since the time she left. His first apprenticeship, started with a lie, ended with a lie. But she had been more than a student; she had been his friend, his confidant, his lover. He had thought they would walk together forever, unstoppable. But she had forsaken him and the paths of light, seduced by a man who called himself Demios.

Raztlain had always wanted his chance to prove himself against Demios, but he had never found him, he had never been able to save Gelu from his clutches, and where she was now was anyone’s guess. Then again, he had never really tried. He had hidden behind his duties to the Council, to the other students. He never sought far because that might interfere with his teaching of Cyan.

Cyan.

Another sore point.

His second apprentice, his second failure. He had been so sure that he could mold Cyan into a paragon for the light. There was no attachment to him, no fatherly emotions, no brotherly feeling. It had been a bond of teacher and student, just the way it should be. But Cyan had walked away as well, forsaken the teaching of the Jedi just like Darwin had.

Another failure.

Darwin had left the academy while Raztlain was in charge, before Skywalker had come back to put everything straight. Luke had trusted Alies, and Alies had failed. Malius too had paid the price for Raztlain’s failures. He taken a mission that Alies was too timid to take, and paid for it with his life.

The council had dissolved, by the time Luke returned only Alies and Streen remained, and they oft disagreed on how things were best done. It was the mark of Raztlain’s life, one failure after another: his Father, Gelu, Cyan, Darwin, Luke, the Republic…himself.

But that was not it, not entirely. That feeling of emotion that had ripped him from his dreams had carried more than Raztlain’s usual feelings of pain, anger, and regret. There had been love so powerful that the Emperor himself would have wept; joy so empowering that one could almost hear singing. Those, assuredly, were emotions that Alies had forgotten in his self imposed exile.

He sighed and rose from his bed; a cup (or more) of coffee was in order. In his shabby Coruscant apartment it was only a few steps from bed to kitchen (the area on the wall dedicated to the three feet of cabinet space and one burner. He moved to open the drawer where the coffee was kept and stopped short.

Instead of coffee he found himself staring at a relic from the past. He had intended on stepping to the kitchen but instead found himself stooped over a small table by the refresher door looking into a small drawer that had not been opened in years. It held only one item, something that had once been part of himself. His lightsaber.

Slowly he picked it up and weighed it in his hands, felt the cool metal and imagined a shimmering blade. He stood thus for a long time, perhaps minutes, perhaps hours, while memories of his former days flooded his mind, and still the wave of emotion echoed in the silence.

Someone, somewhere, needed guidance.

“I…am…no…longer…Jedi,” he whispered, but even to himself it sounded more like a question.


Raztlain Alies
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Jerrod CorboDate: Friday, 04 Dec 2009, 5:15 PM | Message # 3
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“Every day a little death...” he had sang earlier during the concert. “Every day a little death, your mind drowning in thoughts that aren’t yours. Cast out of your body until your soul is bare, you wake up to find nothing is as it seems...”

He stirred. The green eyes moved under the closed lids, the only sign of life in the heap that he was on the floor. His face twitched, the audio-sensory stimulus of his environment slowly bringing his consciousness back to the forefront of his mind. Sounds issued from his mouth, a garble of incoherent syllables punctuated by a moan, but nothing that actually made sense. Despite the brevity of this jumble, the thought behind it had been a question, wondering why the guys were making so much damn noise. And who had opened a window. Jerrod lay in the debris strewn living area, the cool night air wafting in through the opening that had once been a glass window. The heavy whooshing of the breeze as it entered the room and the ever constant noises of the city worked to kindle the spark of life back into him, forcing his brain to try and assimilate the information it received from the senses.

His left eye slowly opened, the right side of his face pressing against the dirty, hard flooring. His mouth was open, a little pool of drool adding to the odd mixture of booze, blood, cleaning supplies, grime, dirt or illicit products that had graced this surface throughout the years. He slowly pushed himself off into a semi-recumbent position. He supported his weight with one hand, wiping his mouth with the other, and noticed the dried blood that had trailed down from his nose. Ugh... His vision swam before him and he closed his eyes, gagging some but managing to suppress the urge to be sick. Dared he try getting up? No... he wouldn’t try it just yet.

Slowly, he opened his eyes once more and looked around the room, taking in the sight. His body tensed up and his throat swelled, a new wave of retching coming over him. This time though, he didn’t and couldn’t stop himself. Well, there went the last threads of his dignity: noisily and uncouthly. What had he done?... How could he have... destroyed the room so? Had he gone into a fit of some sort and trashed it in a berserker mood? Oh geez... He couldn’t put it off any longer, could he? He needed help... Maybe being institutionalized was the best thing for him after all. He noticed the hypo-syringe and vial next to him and picked them up, throwing both away as far as he could...

They didn’t go far. He hadn’t enough strength to make them land with the other junk around the room, still too wobbly from both his recent fit and the amount of drugs he had taken who were finally taking their effect. Standing up was possibly worse what with no furniture around to help him heave himself. It took a good five minutes before he was back on his feet, knees slightly bent inwards as he slowly made his way towards the door. Air... he needed air. He wanted to take a walk to clear his mind. But the stupid sofa was angled as to block the door... Damn thing. And so he worked for another ten minutes, pulling, pushing, moving the furniture only a few centimetres, if that, every so often as he fought feebly with it.

And no one came. He’d been out cold for about an hour, and no one had come. It was still early as far as clubbing went, so the band hadn’t come back... and probably wouldn’t for another few hours. What they’d say when they’d find this scene, he didn’t know or even think about. No neighbours had stopped by either. Had they even been woken up? The pad had been sound-proofed for their musical purposes, so risk of having heard were slim. But they must have felt the thuds, surely? But no... this wasn’t the upper levels of Coruscant... The pad was situated rather low in terms of levels and the neighbourhood wasn’t all that tasteful. People tended to leave you to your devices and no one really bothered with their neighbours here. Unless a blaster was fired or a body was found, they didn’t give a damn; and even then...

He made his way through the deserted streets, his pace slow and mournful. The district was more seedy than hellish, so a walk in the streets, although not recommended, was not akin to committing suicide. They were deserted, and he was glad. He looked horrible, even more so than after tonight’s ruined gig, so he was thankful he wouldn’t bump into anyone he knew. Not that he knew many people at this level anyway. A muffled buzzing had crept into his mind again, but the drugs were numbing him enough that he didn’t much mind. The flashes of translucent colours and lights were still swimming before him, but they were subdued, duller.

Had he been able to scream, he’d have. Had he embraced the Force and trained his abilities since teenage-hood, he’d have heard the thoughts... Well, had he embraced and trained the Force within him, he’d have saved himself alot of grief over the years... but that aside, he’d have been ready. Instead, a webbed hand grabbed him and dragged him down an alleyway, pulling him down a slant leading to even less friendly territory. Although his mouth opened, nothing more than surprised pants came out as an Aqualish rushed him. But if Jerrod’s protest were almost silent, his groggy mind had received a jolt and was slowly regaining its full capacities. Internally, he was shouting for mercy, for help… begging for pity. But no one could actually hear him, not when it was all in your head…

His attacker spoke in muffled and limited Basic with a thick accent, blaster aimed at Jerrod’s torso. Jerrod instinctively reached for the blaster hanging in the holster to his side but grasped at nothing. Dunce! He’d taken that off during his tremendous efforts at moving the sofa and hadn’t rearmed himself. “Give me money!” grunted the Aqualish, waving his blaster. Jerrod commenced to protest that he didn’t have any, but the thug re-aimed his blaster and shot. He had intended to hit Jerrod on the shoulder to incapacitate him, but the shot hit the duracrete wall where Jerrod had been mere seconds ago.

How had he known that he had to move? He didn’t know, and frankly, didn’t care. True, his reaction time should have been worsened thanks to the Nyex—his physical abilities limited despite his mind sobering up—but this instinctive reaction was not to be questioned. The Aqualish fired at him once more and growled in his native tongue, no doubt swearing. And again, Jerrod dodged. He wasn’t moving fast, but as long as this was keeping him alive, things were fine, right? But the alien didn’t seem to appreciate this little dance one bit. He threw his blaster on the ground and lunged towards Jerrod to try and finish him off with a more personal touch. Quite temperamental these Aqualish, weren’t they? But again, Jerrod dodged. Slowly at first but now more quickly, Jerrod felt anger swell within him. A tremendous rage. He felt as though a plan had gone horribly wrong and all he wanted to do was to kill that annoying alien that had ruined his mugging attempt… no… his walk. A walk. He had been out to walk, not to mug someone. And although he had just attempted to block the Aqualish from grabbing, Jerrod now threw himself at him as best he could to choke the life out of him. And all the while, the buzzing in his head grew clearer and stronger, someone shouting in anger in what he recognized as Aqualish. Surely not in his mind, he was hearing the alien shout at him… But even as he wrestled to try and squeeze his hands around the neck, he heard him shout “You pay!” in Basic this time. The two voices united and superimposed themselves, one directly in his mind and the other from having been heard. And all the while, the guttural sounds in his mind intensified to the point of causing him pain. “Stop it!” He shouted, ordering the alien “Stop it! STOP IT! I'LL KILL YOU!” and he had no idea if he was verbally shouting at him or replying in kind with a barrage against his attacker’s mind.

As he still fought him with the same anger, matching him in rage, the translucent colors and lights converged around the Aqualish who started to tremble unnaturally. Anger turned into fear, and fear into panic… And Jerrod had little choice but to mimic this emotion, leeching it off the alien. The colors flashed around him, and in a last ditch effort to escape, the Aqualish was sent flying across the alley to connect with the opposing wall. His body hit head first and he fell with a thud, a pool of blood forming around his ugly bald cranium thanks a gash.

For Jerrod, it was as if he was awaking from a long sleep, his mind suddenly clearing. The panic he felt slowly dissipated as he backed up against the other wall to catch his breath and assess the situation. That’s when he noticed the blood and the motionless alien. Almost simultaneously, his jaw dropped and his eyes widened, the realization of what had happened hitting him like a slap in the face. He had heard the Aqualish’s voice in his head: that much he was certain of. He couldn’t deny it. Did that mean, that all those other voices swarming about… were they of the dozens or more people standing next to him at the time of his attacks? And how had he managed to throw the alien without actually lifting him? It was just like the room, wasn’t it? Did that mean that he was?… No. No, no, no, no… He couldn’t be. It was impossible. For minutes he just kept starring at the lifeless alien, a fear very much of his own filling his mind. Then suddenly, without thinking, he picked up the discarded blaster pistol and walked away, soon breaking into a run (more like a slow jog thanks to Nyex) to escape the scene. And all the while, he was screaming in his mind.

---------------------------------------------

He didn’t know how long he had been escaping for. Or what he was escaping from for that matter. But deep down? He didn’t really want to know; didn’t care to know. It had felt like a long time and that’s all that mattered to him. The slow jog had ended some time ago and all he could do now was walk slowly and stagger as though he were drunk. Indeed, he probably looked like he was one major "boozie" who had been in a fist fight. But that didn’t bother him. It might have bothered his parents, but they were safe and cozy on Rhinnal and what they didn’t know couldn’t hurt them. And frankly, looking as he did, he appeared less inconspicuous in this part of town. And this time he was armed, the Aqualish's blaster stuffed into his trousers' pockets with only the handle sticking out.

Getting rather exhausted from the tremendously hectic day he had been through so far, Jerrod finally came to a stop and rested against a building, taking in his surroundings. The area appeared deserted and the only noises came from the skylanes way high above. It was still pretty dark, but then again, things were always pretty dark in lower-income neighbourhoods. A few blocks down appeared to be a 24 hour diner that probably stayed opened all 5 days of the week and only ever rarely closed. He knew the type.

He slowly made his way to it, the door sliding away to give him access as he passed in front. The soles of his boots stuck to the floor as he made his way to a booth at the far end of the establishment, sitting in the end seat as to get a good view of the door. A young but shabby looking waitress slowly made her way towards him with indifference. He was thankful his life didn’t depend on her. He was pretty sure he’d have time to die before she’d reach him should he have sported a life threatening injury.

The diner was in the Med'soto style, meaning that everything was outdated and faded. In fact, it was like stepping back in time. And he was pretty sure the place hadn’t been cleaner in its heydays. Even the brunette waitress in her cheap suit looked kitsch. The grease-speckled establishment probably attracted a clientele of itinerant freighter pilots, dock workers and other oddball assortments during the day. But at this time of night? The place was empty. The owner was probably running this business as a front for a smuggling operation and had his night cook covering for him. Yeah… that must be it. At least it usually was the case in holodramas. And the food was bound to be cheap, oily and unhealthy. If he had any care for his arteries, he’d stay clear of sustenance. Not that he had any money… so he had just came in here to catch a breath and relax. He was sure the waitress would glare at him when he’d ask for some water and nothing else. Probably ask him to leave too.

“What can I getcha?” she asked, the annoying twang of her voice making Jerrod shudder a little. “I’ll just have…” he started, but before he could answer her, he turned his head upwards and looked at the ceiling where hidden speakers were providing background music: Every day a little death..., he heard himself singing, Every day a little death, your mind drowning in thoughts that aren’t yours. Cast out of your body until your soul is bare, you wake up to find nothing is as it seems...

You have got to be kidding me, he thought. “You have got to be kidding me”, he said aloud. “What is this? Some kind of galactic joke?” He was not impressed.

“Hey! I happen to like WarpDrive” piped in the brunette, affronted. “I couldn’t get time awf to go see them tonight, but my friend went. She said it was amazing until they sang this song. Then everything went crazy, and poor Jerrod…”

“…was conked on the head with a chair some moron threw at him? Yeah, I know” he cut her. “My head still hurts” he added, pointing at the side of his head where he had been hit.

“Nah… you can’t be… him She said sceptically, squinting and scrutinizing him with her eyes. And as he rolled his, he lifted the side of his shirt to reveal his birthmark. If she truly was a fan, she’d know about it.

“Oh my gawd! I knew it had to be you! I just didn’t think it was…” she exclaimed shrilly in a muffled voice as not to draw the cook’s attention. A few seconds later, he was signing an autograph and informed her as gently as he could that all he wanted was a glass of water and to be left alone. But she pushed him for more. Clearly he couldn’t settle just for water. She rushed to get him a cup of coffee, “On the hawse!”, despite his protest. “It’s just a cup of cawfee. The boss won’t mind. ‘Sides, it’s my treat. Don’t chu werry about it”.

Just a cup of coffee? He highly doubted that. She had come back with a cup that was as clean as one could expect from this place and it was filled with this awful looking grey liquid. It smelled foul but was steaming hot, which felt nice for his hands as he clutched the mug. He thanked the waitress with a feeble smile and turned his attention to the liquid inside, staring at it, transfixed as though it would reveal some secret. The waitress eyed him for a few seconds, half admiring him, half wondering what was wrong, before walking away behind the bar to occupy herself with re-arranging a few bottles of this and a couple of that. And all the while, she gave him furtive glances. Ten minutes later, she had retreated in the employee-only section leaving Jerrod to his thoughts. No doubt she had been disenchanted by her idol who had proved to be aloof. Not that he really cared at this point, or notice that he appeared to be alone in the diner for his thoughts were of the night he had been through so far, eyes still fixated on the coffee which was slowly losing its heat as time went by. Coruscant could have gone up in flames outside the diner’s windows and he still wouldn’t have noticed.


Jerrod Corbo

Message edited by Jerrod Corbo - Saturday, 05 Dec 2009, 4:09 PM
 
Raztlain_AliesDate: Wednesday, 16 Dec 2009, 5:33 PM | Message # 4
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Experimentally Raztlain Alies moved the silvery hilt around in something akin to ancient battle strokes. The light glinting off the handle flickered in his eyes and sparked more memories of his once dedicated past. How and where had he gone wrong? And why?

Her continued to twirl the weapon idly, his mind a rampage of thoughts and emotions. Jedi were supposed to forsake emotions such as passion and attachment, anger or fear. A life devoid of such pleasures that every other sentient was granted. That was where Alies failed; he had thought to secure his place within the annals of the Jedi BY his emotions. He had thought that one could make use of powerful emotions, so long as he, or she, was able to control it and place the Force above all.

But that was too difficult, to demanding to place the whims of the mystical Force above the needs of your family, or friends…or lovers. Gelu had relied on him to teach her how to come to terms with the demands of the Force; what he had taught her was to rely on her emotions too much, to give in where she ought not. And she turned to the Dark Side.

Why now then, if the Force actually guided its users, why would it guide him to this youth that so badly needed aid? Assuredly Skywalker would be better suited to confront this person. For, equally as assuredly, this one was powerful for Raztlain to be able to sense him at all, especially after so long of trying in vain to ignore the Force. But it was there noen-the-less, that feeling of need, an urging for Alies to go, to find, and to protect yet another Force Sensitive.

He sighed. He had not really left the Order so much as allowed it to fade from his mind. He could remember some two years ago having asked advice from Luke concerning Gelu. Luke understood; after all, he had Mara to look after. Luke had granted him a furlough in which to try to locate her once again. Once again he had failed, but rather than return to Yavin and face Luke with another failure he had remained on Coruscant, the last traceable location of his former lover.

He cast his eyes towards the drawer, intent of replacing the weapon, only to blink in surprise. The saber was now dangling from his belt, place in its rightful place as if old habits were still strong in his mind. He smiled ruefully and scrubbed his beard. He had never really left the Force, he only thought he had. In fact, when he thought about it he was using the Force every day, relying on it to keep him out of trouble, allowing it to guide his decsisions (unless it were to return to Yavin), and using it to aid him in trivial matters.

“I must go,” he finally decided. First, though, he would send a memo to Luke, it was time to stop hiding from his failures and face the future full on.


Raztlain Alies
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Jerrod CorboDate: Saturday, 19 Dec 2009, 6:34 PM | Message # 5
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The next few hours had passed as a blur. The night cook, probably at the bequest of the annoying and now disenchanted waitress, had come to shoo him out of the diner after an hour or so. The remaining time was spent trying to get back home, which was harder than it sounded when you had no money… The medicine had entire subsided by now and his pace had been good, the emotions and memories of the night pushed as far back in the rear of his mind. It all felt like a dream now. It didn’t help that the incessant drone had moved to the forefront of his mind again, a buzzing applying pressure and partly fogging his consciousness.

Sun had risen, early morning bringing about a renewal of the bustle that never truly died on Coruscant. But the rays didn’t truly reach him here where he was. He discarded the Aqualish’s blaster pistol in a trashcan after wiping it with his clothes to smear any prints he could have left on it. Quite stupid given he was probably leaving more evidence that way. Luck and patience had finally managed to bring him back to his worried bandmates who had come back from clubbing (inebriated) to the scene their cheap residence had been left in. They had all assumed the worst.

Authorities had been contacted and dealt with. Jerrod had concocted a story to the best of his abilities and had acted out being in a worse off condition that he truly was in. Being theatrical did have advantages. The officer dealing with him had quickly dismissed him after the formalities and sent him off to a MedCenter for a check-up (and a prescription). Yet why did he find it slightly unnatural the way the officer had accepted his story and had allowed him to go? No matter…

He had come back to the apartment to find the window being replaced and the boys, although slightly hungover and tired, replacing the furniture about. The damage, although not extensive, was obvious and mostly aesthetical. It wouldn’t interfere with their living here but the place looked like more a dump than ever thanks to him. Best not tell them a thing of what truly happened. Although he had told them the same story as the officer, he knew they didn’t truly believe him. He could feel it despite their reassuring pats on the back and clowning around.

A shower and a change of clothes later, Jerrod had taken his prescribed pills (who was he to defy doctor’s orders?) and had left the boys claiming he needed to speak to the officer again. In truth, he just wanted peace and quiet away from disbelieving friends. And so, he headed to the Boribos Prefecture looking for peace and quiet but only found annoyance. The buzzing drone in his mind only accentuated despite the medication and all he felt like doing was punch someone to vent out his frustrations. Couldn’t he just get a few moments’ peace?


Jerrod Corbo
 
Raztlain_AliesDate: Wednesday, 30 Dec 2009, 9:43 AM | Message # 6
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Hate was forbidden for the Jedi, but Raztlain Alies could get fairly close to feeling it for Reuke Cambrist, and the more so lately as he continually attacked the Jedi. It was shameful, deceitful, and one step from resurrecting the Empire in its latter days, just before the Purge. Where once Alies knew friends (albeit few) now he saw only ravenous enemies stalking the remaining Jedi like a Nexu on a Bark Rat.

It was because of Cambrist that, after he had showered and changed (wearing normal Coruscanti Street garb) Alies had stuffed his lightsaber in his deep coat pockets. He left the holo-screen on (which had been displaying some daytime host bantering about his views on Cambrist’s latest attack of the Jedi) and exited the trashy little apartment he’d leased some two years before.

During his shower he had decided that he had no time to wait on Luke’s answer, this person (if there truly was one {Alies had begun to think he may have imagined him}) needed help and guidance now, not later. Besides, there was no knowing when, or if, the Grand Master of the Jedi Order would even answer him.

Relying on the Force to show his way Raztlain simply began walking in what he hoped was the right direction. Luke had used this technique several years before in hopes of finding Han Solo, Alies only hoped that he could do as well. It was a curios thing to use the Force after so long of trying to hide from it, but it felt as natural as if he’d been doing it the entire time, and perhaps he had. Surely he’d have needed practice to keep himself tuned to that light beck and call.

As he turned his feet calmly and confidently the shades of Coruscant began to deepen and darken, turning lightly decorated streets into dingy alleys, fresh painted surfaces into graffitied masses, and well dressed beings into ragged clawing itinerant. Alies shuddered at the sight but the Force willed him to continue further.

Hours into his nomadic wandering, with filth literally clinging to his skin (so much for the shower) his feet stopped outside what appeared to be a night club of sorts. His frown deepened as he gazed at the billboard announcing bands and other forms of entertainment. At least he’d come to a cleaner part of the ecumenopolis.

The Force told him that there had clearly been some sort of a disturbance here, but the scene inside told him just as clearly that whatever it was had not been bad enough to fend off the nightly intoxication, dancing, and loud music. He winced as the beat of drums pelted his ears and echoed inside his head. Closing his eyes he once more allowed the Force to take his feet where it would.

Soon he stood next to another series of apartments that were, perhaps, even worse than his. He could feel a definite trail emanating from this place, warmer than before, but he could tell also that the aura that he sought was not inside. He could hear more loud music inside the dwelling but without the full fledged sounds of a party. Probably just some teenaged punks doing (what they considered) their part to defy authority. Likely they would all wake with hangovers tomorrow which would in turn give them a much needed excuse to lie about, jobless, and drawing well-fare. He mumbled something incoherent under his breath and followed the trail further.

It was not difficult to find the dead Aqualish, the Force aura lead straight to it. H ewaved away the gathering crowd with a simple mind trick. They fled from him like he was an angry, hungry Rancor; they’d be back. Curiosity was like that, no matter what the personal danger some could never resist the temptation to have a c;oser look. It was clear that the Force weilder had been here, what was not clear is what had happened to cause the death. Raztlain passed the body after only a cursory examination.

He spent less time at the diner; the overexuberant waitress going well beyond what was nessesary to answer his query. In seconds he had discovered that a young, and apparently famous boy had been here; given the state of the diner Alies could only assume that noone would have come here willingly. This lead him to belive (with a degree of certainty) that this was the person he was looking for.

From all the pieces he was able to gather he assumed that this youth, famous as he was, had been at the center of the earlier comotion at the concert hall, had fled and gotten into some sort of trouble with an Aqualish, sought reprive in the most backwater looking diner he could find, only to be hearded out by the incessant annoyance of the waiter.

He was back to square one with little choice but to return to the shabby appartment where he’d felt the youth’s fading aura.


Raztlain Alies
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Jerrod CorboDate: Friday, 01 Jan 2010, 6:23 PM | Message # 7
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Not that he knew any of this, but Jerrod also shared Raztlain’s fears about the talks in the Senate. There had been that diplomat who had made the headlines about proposing Force-user registration and now there was a Senator who was talking about banning the lightsaber. He wouldn’t have cared much before, but the recent revelation that he probably was “gifted” (he saw it more as a curse) with the… Force… meant that he could probably become subject to at least the registration law. Lightsabers couldn’t affect him as he didn’t own one and wasn’t planning on buying one anytime soon. Not that he could buy one, right? Didn’t those Jedi make them? Not that he cared. And he would have to stop thinking about the Jedi AND the Force. If he truly had it, then he’d try squashing it out. He still desperately clung on to the notion that the medication would help him, but that delusion was probably due to his addiction. Although he didn’t want to admit it to himself and was burying it in the deepest parts of his consciousness, he rather knew the Force was something one could just exorcise out of a body. Could it be medically removed though? Those midichlowhatever… could they be removed from a body? He was so screwed.

Enough! He had come out here to get a change of air and of thoughts, but all he could do was dwell on last night’s events. Were they really last night’s? It all seemed like a fuzzy dream to him while he loitered around the Boribos Prefecture, somewhat stoned from the prescribed medication. Still, he couldn’t help but feel that he should head back home. The boys had been worried, and Jerrod felt he should probably fork up some credits to repair the dingy suite he had further ruined. A letter to mother and father was in order then. Arguing would probably follow as he would ask for them to transfer money to him from his trust fund. A trust fund he was bleeding dry with his antics. To blazes with his parents! They had no clue what he was going through. And whose fault is that? A little voice told him. Oh dear… was his subconscious acting up after all these years? Har har. Just what he needed.

He was back in his neighborhood within the same amount of time the trip had taken him to get to the prefecture. And as he walked towards his building, he heard it. Well, felt it, rather. Something in his head. Felt some other presence in the vicinity. It stuck out and he didn’t truly know how to describe the feeling he was experiencing. This sensation was entirely new and rather odd for him. But he knew. He knew someone was in the neighborhood. And someone who was… looking for him? The emanation was faint, but he could determine that much. Which beggared the question: if he could feel all of this even somewhat drugged and having no proper training in the Force (if he truly had the Force, something he’d rather not have. A chemical imbalance making him delusional and causing him all of the aches over the years would have been preferable), did this mean that whoever he was sensing… could he or she feel him in return? Could they tell exactly where he was? Jedi could do that, he was sure. Oh crap. It had better NOT be a Jedi. As fear crept into him, Jerrod turned around and looked down the other way. Using the duracrete wall to push himself to a start, he sloppily ran/staggered to escape what he imagined would be an unpleasant encounter. His bandmates would have to wait, and so would this stranger, whoever and where ever they actually were.


Jerrod Corbo
 
Raztlain_AliesDate: Saturday, 02 Jan 2010, 4:21 PM | Message # 8
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It seemed, in retrospect, that his whole life (or at least the last twenty years) had revolved around searching for someone or something. He had spent years searching for Gelu, and more years searching for Cyan. Now he was searching for little more than an aura, and he was not even sure why. He told himself that this was an attempt to assuage his guilt for his other failures in life.

As he walked the Jedi Master maintained a light flow of the Force to employ his singularly greatest talent. As such most of the people that he passed saw little more than a shift in the shadows; those few that did see him looked at him with a mixture of curiosity and contempt. Of course, he could have hidden himself completely from all but the most talented Force users had he wanted to concentrate, but the walk was a long one and he had no intentions of arriving exhausted only to find some so-called Sith waiting on him.

He was nearing the apartment when it happened; a spike (if that really described it) in the aura’s awareness. He knew the other was there, and the other knew he was there. He stopped dead and increased his touch on the Force to ensure that his disguise held. With the illusion in place he took advantage of the freedom to look about for whomever it was that had felt him. Of course, he saw nothing out of the ordinary but he maintained caution as he began moving again, eyes closed, ears strained, and what ability remaining within him trained around himself for signs of the youth.


Raztlain Alies
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Jerrod CorboDate: Saturday, 02 Jan 2010, 4:58 PM | Message # 9
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And once again in the span of a day, Jerrod found himself racing away for his life, fear and adrenaline pumping through his system. Although the Aqualish had been easily dealt with (not that he was proud of it, but it had been self defense after all), he was certain this “predator” would be less so. A twinge of guilt and regret flashed through his mind as he thought of the Aqualish thug and the demise he had inflicted on him. Dead. No less than he probably deserved, but Jerrod still had… taken someone’s life. His hands were soiled. Not that he had used his hands in the killing blow, but death was death no matter now it was administered.

This person would probably stalk him down and make him pay, bring him to justice. And that was no less than Jerrod deserved, true, but he didn’t want to end up in jail. He interrupted his staggering pace ever so often to peer behind him, but other than the random assortment of passerby that normally flitted through the neighborhood, there was nothing he could spot of a possible assailant. As for the neighborhood itself, it would surely serve him well to have explored it somewhat in yesterday’s dazed and frantic escape from the apartment after his fit. Not that he had taken much of the sights in what with the state he had been in, but he reckoned he could still manage some sort of great escape.

Coruscant’s lower levels were a maze of durasteel and duracrete, old passageways mingling in with new ones, others blocked off or entirely forgotten about save for select few who knew of their real purposes. His route took him through one of those less frequented passages (hence why he had been so lost yesterday) and he had every intention of running back towards that greasy diner. He wouldn’t actually stop there (he’d be crazy to), but if he could lose this pursuer, then everything would be alright. At least he hoped. So long as he didn’t end up near the alley where the altercation had taken place: he probably couldn’t have stomached that. And so, his breathing fast and irregular, his heart pounding his chests, thoughts colliding through his head, he pressed on. So much for the possibility of a great career. He'd probably have to exile himself on some backwater planet in the Outer Rim. These overtly dramatic conjectures were of course by-products of an overzealous imagination mingled with slightly reduced faculties.


Jerrod Corbo
 
Raztlain_AliesDate: Saturday, 02 Jan 2010, 6:26 PM | Message # 10
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Eyes still closed and body shrouded with the Force Alies concentrated on the Force signature that had clearly been spooked. That was not what he had intended but with the dead Aqualish undoubtedly a byproduct of the Force surges Raztlain could well understand the youth’s apprehension. The problem was that without Alies being able to get to the aura, he’d also not be able to reassure him.

His feet still moved, seemingly of their own accord, though they moved slower now as Raztlain contemplated what to do. With the youth scared his aura shone like a clear beacon, Alies would have no trouble finding him now. He walked purposely, if slowly, following the youth further into the bowels of Coruscant; as they descended he allowed the Force to siphon off ever-so-slightly so that, though still shrouded he had more of a reserve left from which to draw.


Raztlain Alies
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Jerrod CorboDate: Saturday, 02 Jan 2010, 6:46 PM | Message # 11
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Deeper and deeper his feet took him, the assailant’s presence taking a forefront in his mind amongst the drowned buzzing that was creeping up on him. He was perspiring heavily now, heart pounding as his body was being pushed harder and further than he was used to. He even had a stitch on his left side now, the cramp being highly uncomfortable. Yet he pressed on, the faint noise of his boots on the ground echoing in the cramped quarters.

But lack of proper regular cardio and muscle exercise meant that this chase was about to end sooner than he wanted it to. His fatigued right foot twisted slightly with this newest step and he sprained his ankle some. The speed he was fleeing at wasn’t all that great and so the damage wasn’t too bad. He felt he could continue and he did so, only to stumble again less than 10 seconds later, spraining his ankle further and this time careening around the corner of the nearest intersection only to stumble on the floor in a flurry of swears and curses.

Jerrod used the wall to put himself back up and tested his feet. Luckily, he was used to such minor ankle injuries that the damage was rather minimal despite the current throbbing of that. What with an ache on his left side and a slightly sprained ankle, he hobbled awkwardly about knowing that this game of cat and mouse would stop in the very, very near future.


Jerrod Corbo
 
Raztlain_AliesDate: Sunday, 03 Jan 2010, 9:20 PM | Message # 12
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Raztlain sighed, this was tiring, and his quarry was going to injure himself beyond repair, or worse. Alies let the Force bleed off until he was completely exposed for the first time since the chase began. He slowed to a casual walk with an unassuming look on his face, he even whistled a peppy tune, but his mind was on something else.

Jedi master Raztlain Alies, while proficient with a saber, was no fighter. His skills lay along a different path that some would say was better than swordsmanship. In fact, Alies had won battles without ever having to lift a weapon using his technique. He had found that, with years of practice, he’d been able to project such strong illusions that most were completely dumbfounded. Once he’d even fooled Master Skywalker.

So it was that he began to project mirrors of himself closing in on the youth from every side. Every image mimicked his actions so that all of them walked casually and whistled softly. He held up a hand in the universal gesture of peace, and his mirrors did the same. He did not know if the youth would see them but this trick rarely failed. The problem with it was that it took a lot of concentration.

“Please,” he said softly, “I will not harm you.” He never broke stride, but he did slow even more.


Raztlain Alies
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Jerrod CorboDate: Monday, 04 Jan 2010, 3:25 PM | Message # 13
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Jerrod stopped dead in his tracks and flattened against the duracrete wall as someone approached him from the other end of the alley. His already pale face drained further of any remaining color and his breathing maintained its fast and irregular pace. He stared at the approaching figure for a few seconds before noticing others just like him cornering him. He (or they?) didn’t want to harm him? Odd way of demonstrating it by encircling him like a pack of vornskrs upon their prey.

Slowly, Jerrod inched a hand towards the butt of his blaster secured in the holster hanging on his side. His head was held high and still faced towards the man he had first noticed, yet his eyes darted from one stranger to another as they approached him, hands up in a sign of peace. He probably had no chance of actually extracting the pistol, but at least he’d try to if the need came for it.

Adrenaline was pumping in his system and it took every ounce of will power to dismiss the “flight or fight” instinct that wanted to kick in. If anything, he’d try to remain cool despite the possible danger. After all, he really didn’t want to add a second person to his killing count, especially if their motives truly were genuine and altruistic. Indeed, something in the stranger’s voice had seemed more reassuring than menacing. But anyone with enough acting capabilities could convince anyone of anything: especially if they were using some mind tricks. Which he was fairly sure this man was employing at the moment. Though there were a handful of them, he could only truly perceive one set of footsteps and some of them appeared as though they flickered and faded for fractions of seconds, almost as if he were able to discern their true existence (or in this case, lack of). Could this truly be an illusory trick? He didn’t know what to believe. He also wouldn’t try to think too much about it, his mind starting to hurt again.

And as he strained to compose himself, an inferno in his mind was set ablaze as the Force rippled from him in another uncontrolled burst, his vision obscured once more by flashing, pulsating lights. He gritted his teeth and his knees buckled as he sank some, still holding on the wall with one hand for support. The other had left the blaster’s butt and was clutching at his head. He let out a groan as he turned away from the men and cursed under his breath, somewhat maddened by this attack and show of weakness in front of strangers.
Who are you? What… What do you want with me?...” he said on a weaker tone than he had expected to come out of his mouth. With duller looking eyes, he turned his head once again to look at his interlocutor.


Jerrod Corbo
 
Raztlain_AliesDate: Monday, 04 Jan 2010, 4:49 PM | Message # 14
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The Jedi Master stopped when the youth’s hand twitched towards his weapon. Not that he was afraid of being shot, he had talents to take care of that as well but it was clear that the boy was frightened enough; seeing a man shake off blaster bolts would probably not help the situation. He slowly rose is left hand to match his right, keeping both well clear of his own weapon.

He cleared his mind of the Force (but kept it at hand just in case) causing his mirrors to systematically wink out; he now stood directly in front of the boy at a distance of some ten meters. “My name is Raztlain Alies,” he said softly, “and I want to help you.” He only answered the youth’s questions; there was no need to go into great detail when the boy was not likely to understand half of what the Jedi told him.


Raztlain Alies
Jedi Knight


Message edited by Raztlain_Alies - Monday, 04 Jan 2010, 4:51 PM
 
Jerrod CorboDate: Monday, 04 Jan 2010, 5:22 PM | Message # 15
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The world swam slightly before him, tilting rather unnaturally to the left for a while as he tried to steady himself. One thing was for sure, the man was now alone. So. Jerrod had been right. Or had he? For all he knew, those other incarnations of this Raztlain Alies might only have been caused by his own rebelling mind. Oh well. He wiped his perspiration covered forehead and took the sight of the man in, studying (if not scrutinizing) him with his gaze. Help him? How could he help him? How could he even know what he was going through? Oh. Right. He was... one of them, wasn't he? Another hunch that had proved to be right. At least, he thought.

"Jerrod. Jerrod Corbo" he answered, omitting to present a hand. It would have been the proper thing to do for introductions, he knew, but he couldn't care less at the moment about the decorum his parent had taught him. "And how can you help me?" he added with just a twinge more disbelief and arrogance than he had wanted to. He grimaced some at the sound of his voice and tried to give Alies a somewhat pitiful look in the hopes that the man would understand and possibly forgive any impertinence from Jerrod given his current state.


Jerrod Corbo
 
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